The Emerald Shores of Ireland - Part 10

The Emerald Shores of Ireland
A trip journal by David Bowers
9/2/08-9/11/08
Part 10

On our way to Bunratty Castle, Jerry told us a bit about the banquet, namely that it would include chicken and spareribs, and that the only silverware we would have is a knife. There were some groans as it sunk in that this would be an eat with your fingers meal. Jerry also mentioned how this dinner has changed over the years, how they used to not even give you a plate, just a large slab of the stalest bread they could find to use as a plate, and that it was a messy uncivilized affair. But now, we can relax in the knowledge that it has been made a civilized banquet. As a guide he asked if we remembered what he had said earlier about castle stairs, and we nodded that we had. He mentioned the program for the evening would begin in an upper level hall, the only access to which is up one of those spiral stairways, and that if we didn't feel like we could make it up the stairs we could decline the cocktail reception and go directly to the main banquet hall on the entry level. Speaking of the cocktail reception, he explained that we would be given a cup of mead, which is basically wine made from fermented honey. Then we would all move down to the main hall for the banquet, and that while there is some entertainment during cocktails and dinner, the main entertainment is after dinner. Mental calculations were starting to be made in our heads as we realized we had an 8:45 seating, and this sounded like it would be a long affair. He then came down the aisle passing out our dinner tickets, which he suggested we could retain after the meal as a souvenir.

We then pulled into the Bunratty Folk Park car park, and it seems like I was just here. We stepped off the bus and moved into the reception area, just like before. This time we had tickets to get in and after clearing the entrance gate we moved as a group to the castle. While the castle has some nice floodlighting, the walkway from the reception area to the castle could use some more light. We were almost to the castle, which is an authentic castle that had been left to ruin but was purchased in the mid 1900's and restored as a tourist attraction. Jerry had mentioned the furnishings of the castle, while mostly period furnishings, are not original to this castle. Well, we were almost to the castle the walkway went down about 8 stairs (there was a ramp bypass available) then we walked more or less in a straight path to the castle. We found the main entry to the castle to be so far up it required one or two good flights of wooden stairs up to the front doors.

When we entered the castle, we would find all the people working the event were dressed in period costume, and most if not all also were in the cast for the entertainment. Part of the period effect was addressing everybody with "My Lord" or "My Lady" as was appropriate. "Good Evening, My Lord!" as the attendant at the castle door tore the stub off the ticket. This had the unfortunate effect of removing all traces of what the ticket was for, as the stub is a generic stub for all of Shannon Heritage's events, and only the part they tore off referenced what it was for. After tickets were torn, we were directed to the spiral stairs where we made our way slowly and carefully up to the Great Hall. As we entered the Great Hall we were again welcomed, "A cup of Mead, My Lord?" I took the cup that was being offered to me and made my way into the hall.

In the center of the hall was a raised platform with a harpist and a violinist playing some background music as people arrived and took places along walls of the room forming a large circle. I noticed they were wise enough to put heavy duty dust cloths on the castle furniture, particularly those pieces likely to be used as tables to return the mead cups. Looking around the room was furnished by furniture, tapestries, and decorations that one would expect in a castle. I did note the mead cup I was given was a most unusual piece of crockery that had a green, yellow and brown pattern to it, unlike anything I had seen before. The mead itself was almost sickly sweet, and that sweetness demanded you take it slow. After the guests had assembled a character I will refer to as the MC addressed the crowd, introducing you to the castle. He pointed out some of the furniture and other features of the room. There was some more music while he got out two crowns. At this point he pulled two people out of the audience and made them the honorary Duke and Duchess for the evening.

After the crowning, it was time to head to the banquet hall for dinner. This took some time as there was only one stairway, which is one person wide, and is in uneven so you can't move too fast. When we did arrive in the banquet hall, I found a large room with a multitude of long wooden tables with bench seats (no backs), mostly set perpendicular to the stage area, with a really long table that stretched across the back of the room parallel to the stage with only a break by the throne. The servers/entertainers directed people in an orderly fashion to the benches, so no free choice here. We found ourselves at the really long back table facing the back wall, not exactly prime seating, but luck of the draw. The servers also made sure that each and every place was taken, so if you like personal space, forget about it.

Looking further around the room, I saw the throne at the end of our table, and up front was a large fireplace/hearth that served as a stage area. The harpist and violinist from upstairs setup on either side of the fireplace to provide dinner music. Looking in front of me on the table, I don't think one square inch of the table top went unused. Each person had a plate in front of them, which held an empty bowl, to the left was your napkin, to the right was your knife. In front of you each person had a small finger bowl, as well as a cup similar to the one they served mead in. Taking up most of the room in the center of the table were pitchers of water, red wine, and white wine. About every two or three people, there were raised pedestals on the table, and at the start of the meal there were platters with loaves of bread sitting on the pedestal stands, and the salt and pepper shakers hid quite nicely in unassuming wooden shakers under the pedestal. What room that was left held the candleholders, each holding a lit thick white candle.

After everybody was seated, our host appeared at a balcony and used a popular story telling device: he told us that when we entered the castle this evening he stepped not only into a historic place, but into a historic time, at this point the bright house lights went off, and the theatrical lights came on. He summoned the ghosts of the castle to join us as we were special guests to be afforded the privilege of dining in the castle. The safety notices took on a comedic historical beat. "I bring bad news from the east! The MacNamara's have been spotted headed this way! Should the need arise to flee the castle, you may do so either by the doorway which you entered, or through the conveniently labeled secret panel next to the throne" Conveniently labeled meaning a regulation European fire exit sign was mounted just above the panel in question. "The smoking of the tobacco leaf, recently brought to us by Sir Walter Raliegh is forbidden inside the caslte", "If you are using the sorcery known as a mobile phone, for the consideration of your fellow diners, the cast, and ME, please turn it off at this time. If I so much as hear it chrip, I will have you thrown into the dungeons"., "Due to the nature of this hall, please speak softly as sound carries, at appropriate times you may show your appreciation by cheering, callping, or banging gently on the tables" and "After each course, any remaining food will be placed into alms bowls and given to the unfortunate souls down in the dungeons" I will say our host had a way of commanding attention that didn't seem overbearing. The host commented that he noticed we had all brought our daggers with us. (The furnished steak knives, to simulate using no silverware except the dagger the person would have carried with them) He hoped we came in good voice because there would be chances to sing along during the evening, starting with "When Irish Eyes are Smiling" led by the host who would quickly recite the next line for the benefit of those of us who don't have the songs memorized. He explained we would be having a multi course meal, and you can bet each course was introduced with great fanfare.

The first course was the soup, a Cream of Vegetable soup. Of course all the food items were "The finest for miles around", after the soup was introduced the first bowl went to the honorary Duke who was asked to taste it, "If you do not agree this is the best soup you have ever had, you will be replaced!" Needless to say the Duke approved of the soup so the servers came down the rows ladling the soup into the waiting bowls. As there were no spoons, you were expected to drink your soup. Here is where you become happy the Irish school of soup indicates that soup stock must be pureed until it has the consistency of mashed potatoes or baby food. I must say it was a good bowl of soup, with an unexpected hint of spice. Some were using their piece of the loaf of bread to sop up the soup with, others just going ahead and drinking it. Our servers were nice enough to warn us to go ahead and take all the bread now as it would be removed soon. At this we divided up the remaining bread, and not too soon. The servers then came around and collected the soup bowls, leaving the empty plates underneath, and then collected the bread platters from the pedestals.

It was now time for the next course, which would be spareribs, same deal about introducing it with much fanfare, and getting the approval from the honorary Duke This time "If you don't agree these are the best spareribs you have ever tasted, our chef has cooked his last meal in this castle!" The ribs met his approval, and then the servers brought around huge platters of ribs and placed them on the pedestals on the tables. We decided to pass the platters around the area family style each taking one of the precut half slabs. There was a light amount of sauce on the ribs, enough to flavor without getting your fingers too messy. They were willing to supply extra napkins just in case. The ribs were okay, and we finished up the bread as we gnawed on the rubs, either breaking them apart by hand, or using the dagger to cut them apart. About halfway through the ribs course, wooden bowls were distributed, and we were told to toss the rib bones into the bowls. At the end of the ribs course, the plates, bone bowls, and platters were all removed. I should note vegetarians were served a melon salad in place of the ribs, and hey they get a fork. It was just in time for, "Hold It!, this banquet cannot continue until we settle a very important matter." Time for some showmanship to cover the food service crew bringing up the plated dinners. .It seems as if one of our fellow guests has broken one of the castle rules, he has become a bit too friendly with one of the ladies of the castle, to put it nicely. What should be done with, him, and right on cue without provocation the audience calls for him to be thrown into the dungeon. Man can be cruel to fellow man, see examples in the gladiator battles of Rome. I think he was spared a trip to the dungeon but not before fulfilling some nonsensical task imposed by our Duke, that of doing a rendition of "Walking on broken glass" that Simon Cowell would call Karaoke or cabaret at best. I think the whole thing was staged.

Well, now its time for the great fanfare to introduce the main course. This time our host finally mentions about the need for food tasters back in medieval days, leading me to wonder why this wasn't needed for the first two courses. So our host asks if we want him to taste the chicken, and of course the audience says yes. He takes the smallest bite he possibly can, to which the crwod asks for him to take a bigger bite. After waiting about 30 seconds and fining out the host is still okay, we are of course told this is the finest chicken anywhere, we go through the usual Duke approval taste.

Dinner was served already on plates but instead of being brought to each person the servers started passing them out at the ends of the rows, and you were expected to keep passing. Sadly, this sometimes called for the firm instruction to "Keep Passing!" I think the hitch came when a vegetarian in our row refused the chicken plate not realizing they were to pass it along. I'm not exaclty sure what the vegetarian substitute was for this course. When the dust settled I looked at my plate and saw a nice breaded chicken breast on it and lots of mixed vegetables. Not easy to eat stuff like corn on the cob or brocolli, no I mean cut up mixed vegetables. May I remind you that we weren't given forks. The servers also brought around small pitchers of brown sauce (translation: gravy) and placed platters of boiled potatoes on the pedestals We passed the potatoes around for people to finish their plates and then started to eat. Bob scores points for realizing the bone in breast of chicken provides a nice handle to hold the meat while you gnaw at it, alternatively you could use your dagger to "kill the chicken" or cut it up. I also found the dagger good for quartering those boiled potatoes. During this course a lot of proper adults came out of their shells and realized that they weren't kidding about no forks, and said "Hey, we get to eat like we're kids again!" Once that barrier was broken people started settling in and enjoying their dinners. Towards the end of dinner the wooden bowls came around, with the instructions that contrary to what was said before dinner, do not toss your leftover food into the bowls. They then said "Please place your daggers into the wooden bowls" Smart idea, they can then be collected separately as to prevent sharp blades when clearing the tables. The plates and bowls collected, it was time for one last course.

With almost no fanfare the servers reappeared at the ends of the rows passing out, "Keep Passing!" little bowls that held what looked like a small round strawberry cheesecake, similar to what we had last night. They were also kind enough to include small desert spoons. As our server was taking out desert bowls back, she hinted that we may want to turn around on our benches as the rest of the evening would be show. She did say that for the inconvenience of having to turn around, we can use the table as a backrest during the show portion of the evening.

Not too long afterwards the host made pretty much the same request, "For those with seats facing away from the fireplace, you may want to turn around for a better view" A moment later "For those that didn't get the hint, this means now" The show consisted of a lot of musical numbers, some folk songs, some songs to highlight the harp or the violin, and some to highlight "The Ladies of the Castle" known previously as your servers. There must have been some prearrangement as during one folk song it makes reference to seeing the parson, and the singer looked right at Fr. Barry as he sang that verse, and he responded. Perhaps the most touching point of the musical entertainment was during an a capella version of "Danny Boy" sung by the Ladies of The Castle. Our host made point of the fact that s special multi voice rendition of the song had been created just for this event, and to please, no matter how hard it may be, do NOT sing along. No matter how tempting it may be, NOT THIS TIME. What followed has to be one of the prettiest singings of Danny Boy with the multi voice polyphony and the acoustics of the castle banquet hall all coming together. After the musical portion of the evening was finished, it was time for the theatrical lights to go off and the house lights to come back on. Yes, the spell has been broken, the ghosts of the castle have left us, we have returned to our own time. However, before we leave, they would like to offer us one final beverage before we go, and thus we were invited to have some coffee before we leave, served in the room just under this one. Not surprisingly the directions given to get to the coffee social were just like the ones for fleeing the castle.